Reid My Lips

I CAN COUNT REAL GOOD.

We've been kind of silent for a while because we though Tara Reid might be cleaning herself up. Luckily, after endorsing luxury cell phones in the UK (she got a gig?!), Tar-tar made a delightful drunken ass of herself at a London club.



I hope she and Britney form a friendship. Britney's flashin beav....where's yours, Tara?

Nip slips apparently run in the family along with large, melon-like breasts.

Tara's had a busy, busy month. That whore is working her botched plastic surgery for what it's worth. We at Reid My Lips are upset that she would refer to her old plastic surgery as a "nightmare", but let's recap Tara's media blitz:

Us Weekly



This article gives Tara some much needed publicity love and spurned this whole media frenzy she was on. Funny how her breasts get her more press than her last straight-to-DVD blockbuster, The Crow: Wicked Prayer.

The View

Tara is as eloquent and well spoken as ever on The View. Watch the clip here.

Today Show

War? Poverty? AIDS? Everything seems so trite compared to Tara's Plastic Surgery nightmare.

Tyra Banks

Tara vs. Tyra: Who is smarter?






This is totally going to relaunch her acting career. I just know it!

Posts coming this week (maybe):

-More on Tara's family! (twin siblings Patrick and Colleen and brother Tommy...as well as proud parents Tom and Donna!)
-Fan Fiction
-Nip Slips
-Lost friendships and famous feuds
-Lesbian rumors (I made this up!)
-Nasty yeast infections (I didn't make this up!)

This weekend Perez Hilton reported our girl Tara recently got surgery to reduce the size of her modest, natural looking implants. This is ridiculous! If anything, a size boost will help her career. Anna Nicole Smith gets her breast implants reduced and look what happens. Coked out on TrimSpa and now a dead son.

Besides, look at all the cool things Tara could do with her boobs:


Storage space in her inter-breast canyon!


Dress levitator!


What Tara really needs is Laser Vaginal Rejuventation. I heard that shit is the bomb!


R.I.P. Tara Reid's breast implants. We hardly knew you.

Okay, so we have all seen Tara's nip slip ( this also or this one too). No big deal right? Mangled breasts are mangled breasts. But we at Reid my Lips are quite dismayed and upset at the lack of vag slips by the Tara-rist herself.

Tara, Colleagues of yours (including enemies) have had many a pussy slip in the past year. Take Paris Hilton for instance. That haggard lazy-eyed bitch is stealing all of your vaginal thunder. And what about Lindsay Lohan? Jennifer Lopez? Beyonce's armpit?

Tara, let's be honest. Your career revival isn't going to come from an "image clean-up". It's all about the vag slip. Come on Tara, let those labia out. Even us gay men want to see them.

For now, this is the closest we can get:

From Taradise: "Meeting up with Paris and Paris was such a highlight in Greece. Dancing at the clubs was a blast, ... There are just certain people you know you'll always have fun with, and Paris (Hilton) is definitely one of those people" - Tara Reid


Then this happened:


Paris, what the hell? One season you're on the smash hit Taradise partying it up for free with Tara, and the next you're a total hater. Are you jealous because she has larger natural breasts than you do?

Well, what comes around goes around. Grow some balls, Paris. Tara Reid is from Jersey - she knows what being a reject is about. You on the other hand, lose your composure and smear your mascara. Crying girls look haggard as fuck Paris, and you definitely fit that description.

And then you go and do this, Paris. A DUI? "I didn't run over anyone. I didn't get a DUI (drunk driving ticket). I didn't go to rehab. Colin Farrell? You watch that guy smoking cigarettes, every other word is f**k, f**k, f**k, 'I'll screw any girl in the world.'" -Tara

Winner? Tara Reid. She may not get laid because she is fugged out, but that means she probably less likely to have Herpes. And she always has that acting career to fall back on, right?

Another Fashion Week is upon us here in New York City (or for Tara Wyckoff, New Jersey, a convenient 26.4 miles from Bryant Park). As we all know, Tara is a style icon and known for her impeccable taste in clothing. So commemorating all things fashion, we'd like to share our top 5 favorite Tara outfits.

#5 LA Fashion Week Frock



Tara wears this organza tablecloth like noone else can. Her impeccable bust line shows off the detailed bat/butterfly embroidery as well as classy underwire. Tara even added in an adorable handcuff-strapped purse to spice up the outfit a little. Tara, you crazy!

#4 La Senora Tara



Again Tara's gorgeous natural curves serve as a focal point for another one of her evening gowns. This sexy spaghetti-strapped dress feautures fancy gold trim in horizontal layers. Obviously the horizontal striped effect is extremely slimming and makes Tara's size 14 waist seem like only maybe a 12. Lane Bryant better watch their backs!

#3 The Little Black Dress that Could



Tara is looking truly fabulous in this stunning black sheer dress at P. Diddy's Birthday bash back in November 04. The cut of this dress shows off a little skin but definitely is well-fitted and classy. She even tops this class-act with some fancy white fur, a great contrast to the traditional sexy black dress. Her publicist couldn't even keep her hands off Tara, she looked that fabulous!

#2 Blue Crush



Footloose and fancy free! Tara gives the deconstructed look a whole new spin here in this gem of an outfit. "Edgy" barely even describes this stunning and audacious outfit. Tara makes it appear she merely took some sheer fabric and had a cat shred it up...not so! This outfit really shows off Tara's gorgeous body and sexy legs. Really I'm left wondering who is the genius...Moschino? Dolce and Gabbana? Betsey Johnson?

#1 Sexy Back



It's all good...with Tara Reid.